The show that was to begin airing August 22nd has been postponed.  We will continue with our airing of this podcast on the next scheduled date of September 5th, due to myriad events that have occurred within the past two weeks.  I will continue to be in touch through our blog, however.

There is so much to be thankful for in this lifetime.  But when we are facing the trials and tributions of infertility, it seems as if there is nothing to be thankful for. 

I had asked for prayers for two women in particular who were in their darkest hours with their journey on our last show.  Shortly after that show began to air, I had been notified that one of them had taken their life.  This was not only a shock, but one of the saddest moments for me, ever since this issue has come into my life. 

I am taking time to refrain, regroup and re-boot…as this has forced me to pause and cry and mourn and try to exhale.  My deepest sympathy goes out to K’s family and friends.  She was a ’sister’ in this ’sisterhood’ we have found ourselves in, and I wanted you all to know.  If only I had had magical words for her, something to give her that last thread of hope to give her the strength to hold on a little longer.  God has a new angel now, and maybe he can explain to her why.

…ON GLOBAL HAPPINESS DAY AND BEYOND

Welcome to our 46th installation of Journeys To Motherhood. We are not only recognizing Global Happiness Day (8-8-08), but are planning to extend it from this show until the next…taking two weeks for finding some way to create a tiny piece of happiness for one of our reproductively challenged sisters each and every day of those two weeks.

There is so much we can do to spread a little joy, and little hope, a little happiness. And our ’sisters’ who are in the middle of this difficult time, SO appreciate a kind word, a kind gesture, anything that reflects our support of them, and our understanding.

And speaking of holidays, we discuss the idea of creating YOUR own holiday….your own ‘holy’ day…a day to keep sacred, just for you…a day to go back in time to be carefree and have fun, whatever that means to you, as you may have done BEFORE all of your current concerns, frustrations and dark moments that usually accompany infertility.

I have had some letters as of late, from women that are suicidal, and even though I’ve been personally in touch with two of you (out of eight!!), I also address you in this particular show. I have never claimed to be a psychologist nor any licensed professional when it comes to issues of the mind, (and I’m sure my husband thinks I need MY head examined at times), but I am a woman that has walked the walk, and I’m willing to share what I know from my own experiences, with the mission of giving hope.

And how about finding out 65 years later, that you were adopted!!!…from your 100-year old mother!!!…and then to meet your 93-year old birthmom!!! Check out that little story we share today!

Happy Global Happiness Day to you all! May you spread the happiness, and may it come back to you ten fold!

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I am pleased to bring you part 3 of my interview with Shelley Sykes. She is an absolute pleasure to speak with and her love of life is contagious.Shelley encourages us to be empowered by our infertility rather than crippled by it. Instead of asking “Why me?” ask instead “Why NOT me?” And THEN know that you, and anyone suffering from infertility, are the ‘CHOSEN’ ones.

It’s truly difficult to think the pain of infertility will go away or that we will one day embrace all the pain and struggles that we endured but one day it will all make sense. You will be the chosen one for that one baby who so desperately needs a home and a family to love.

For more information on Shelley Sykes and how to purchase her books, go to the following websites:

www.shelleysykes.com
www.books-by-shelley-sykes.com

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Welcome to Episode #44!

This week I continued my interview with Shelley Sykes and she is truly an amazing person in that she can see the silver lining in any event. Rather than get down about life, she sees life as the glass is half full with many blessings in store, no matter how bad her day might be.

She reminds us that “God’s delays are NOT God’s denials”…that when things go awfully wrong, we have the ability to translate that into the universe showing us that a shift needs to be made. She also gives us some specific points to consider incorporating into our lives, so we can begin to achieve happiness…no matter what.

Also keep in mind that Global Happiness Day is on 8-8-08 this year so try to think positively about life and try to make a difference in someone else’s life just by saying something nice.

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I am truly inspired by my guest this week who has struggled through infertility, has raised her special-needs child alone, and whose enthusiasm for life is contagious!

Shelly Sykes is an Australian mum as well as the author of six books, tv host, and inspirational speaker. She shares her frustrating journey to conceive, her torment when she was on bedrest near the end of her pregnancy, and why she wouldn’t change one event of her life story.

Join me as we laugh and give thanks for the life that we are blessed with!

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This week is the continuation of my interview with Kari, the foster mom we met on our last show who adopted twins. She discusses the most common reasons children are put into foster care and how to apply to become a foster parent.

Did you know that if you want to just cuddle newborn babies with the understanding that they will be placed elsewhere that you can become an emergency shelter home for newborn babies? There are many options available for those who want to love the many, many children in our foster care system.

Kari and I also laughed and compared stories about how much our adopted children look like us, even though we didn’t give birth to them! They even have some of our character traits, which is truly a sign that God placed them in the right family, where they belong.

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We each have different journeys to find our way to our babies but the joy at the end is always the same. Long before my guest knew of her infertility challenges, Kari and her husband became foster parents at a young age, knowing that they were called by God to help children in need.

Being a foster parent is a special calling because the children are sometimes only with you a short amount of time or they come to you with emotional or developmental problems. But Kari feels blessed because it was through the foster parent program that she and her husband were able to adopt their twin boys.

Listen in as Kari describes her journey to motherhood and her love for all of the foster children that have come through her home.

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Facing infertility issues is very taxing for both people in the relationship. Women often go through the stages of grieving each time the pregnancy test comes out negative and men will react differently than women. In fact, some men still believe that infertility is a “woman’s issue,” which is untrue.

My guest this week is Elizabeth Cessna, a private counselor who treats patients who are struggling with infertility. This struggle can often become all-consuming and sometimes an outside therapist can help you find ways to cope with your grief or an unsupportive spouse.

Elizabeth shares ways to keep your psyche and self-esteem intact during your infertility journey rather than trying to please others. She also shares tips for men who want to comfort their spouse but don’t know how to do so.

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I want to wish you all a Happy Mother’s Day, and a peace of mind, KNOWING that your baby will be with you soon.  Allow yourself whatever it is you need today…to get through the day the best that you can.  Be kind and gentle to yourself.  Surround yourself with love and beauty.  If some don’t understand, that’s ok.  All that’s important, is YOU today.  Love and serenity to you all.  You are always in my thoughts and prayers.

I was perusing through some literature that people had sent to me recently, and there were a few words that prompted me to write, as they are good reminders for us all…but especially for the women struggling with challenges regarding their fertility. 

These particular ones come from the lovely publication entitled Stepping Stones from Bethany Christian Services.  Referencing biblical scripture from Ephesians we are reminded that:  Time is but a fraction of eternity.  Miracles are what they are because they don’t happen every day.  Give your miracle some time.  Remember, God is able to do far more than we ask or can imagine.

And also, from the Psalms: We cannot predict how and when God will bless us with the miracle He has in mind for us.  To some, the miracle may come in the birth of a baby, to others in the adoption of a child, and to others in contentment as a family of two.  In the meantime, sit back in confidence and watch your life unfold.

Sometimes that’s easier said than done.  But if we do what we feel in our hearts we NEED to do, then give it up to God and the universe, we really need to try to feel contentment and joy in other areas of our lives along the way.  We don’t want to miss out on the unfolding of our lives.  I personally felt the absence of joy for many, many years… nothing made me happy, and though I KNEW I had much to be grateful for, I just couldn’t feel it.  In retrospect, I wish I had been more active in meditating on it (as I gave up praying for myself once year 7 had past).  And I wish back then I had been more able to live in the ‘now’.  I would have witnessed more of the unfolding of my life during that decade…as, of course, I will never get that time back.

Once again, it’s easier said than done.  But life goes by swiftly, and we miss out on a lot when we focus on what is missing.  I wish I would have known then, what I tell all of you now.  Just KNOW it will happen one way or another.  No one had ever told me that.  NO ONE.  I believe I would have felt a little more empowered, and a little more hopeful and able to live my life more graciously if someone personally would have told me that, because they had walked in similar shoes.

If YOU had walked in the shoes of infertility, and now have your baby, let the women YOU know personally (who are still battling with their bodies, hearts and souls because they are unable to conceive or carry a baby to term) understand the power of KNOWING.  When we decide that we will have what we desire, no matter what, we create a ‘knowing’.  And that ‘knowing’ can give them a certain peace while they wait.  And just maybe that will help.